My first c-section was not planned. In fact, having one wasn’t even on my radar. Which is probably how it is for most women. I remember not even looking into this form of delivery because I just knew I would deliver my babies vaginally. Well, obviously I was wrong.
I was 38 almost 39 weeks pregnant when I woke up to make my way to the bathroom for the 200th time. I know…………I’m being dramatic. But seriously, the amount of bathroom breaks towards the end of pregnancy is RIDICULOUS! On this particular trip, I realized my underwear were wet. But like most women at this stage of pregnancy, I figured I just peed a little. But it kept happening that whole day, even after emptying my bladder. Now you’re probably thinking, “Your water broke, why didn’t you go to the hospital?!?” Well I didn’t because this was kind of normal for me. It actually happened with ALL my pregnancies.
When I was 20ish weeks pregnant with Bentley, I actually went to labor and delivery because of this occurrence. It wasn’t as bad but enough to freak me out. The nurse that checked me out though, made me feel incredibly dumb for coming in. After that experience, I decided this time I would just wait for my check up on Wednesday. Even though my husband offered to take me multiple times between Sunday and Tuesday, because I was so worried about it. But I didn’t want to waste our time and money if it was nothing again. I waited the three days until my appointment. Bentley was moving around like normal and I had zero contractions, so I figured everything was fine.
When my appointment finally came around that Wednesday morning, I told my doctor what had been going on. I found out that this time it was my water leaking. I remember calling my husband once I found out. This was the one and only appointment he missed during my whole pregnancy. He was taken by surprise when I said, “We’re having a baby today, meet me at the hospital.” His response was, “Like now or can I finish this thing I’m working on?” As you can tell, he was a little shocked that this was actually happening. I remember kind of laughing at him as I responded, “Yes, you need to leave and go home.” He hadn’t packed his bag or anything yet. I actually had just packed my bag that morning. As you can see, we did not think that day was the day.
Well, it turns out RJ could have stayed at work the whole day. Bentley was in no rush. I swear that kid climbed higher up as the day went on. The pitocin was not working at all. I think I maybe had one contraction that whole day, and it wasn’t even a good one. Bentley was determined to stay in his little home.
Fast forward to 9 o’clock that night when the doctor came in and told me that my internal temp was rising, and they would have to take him via c-section if things didn’t start to progress. I was shocked. I remember praying for contractions. This wasn’t part of my plan. I was suppose to labor as long as I could until I needed an epidural. Then my mom would come in when it was time to start pushing. But those contractions never started. This was literally my worst fear. I told everyone while I was pregnant, “I don’t care what happens during labor, as long as, Bentley is ok and I don’t have to have a c-section.” You can definitely say I jinxed myself.
The rest of the night felt like a whirl wind. All of a sudden there were all these people in the room prepping me for surgery, and talking to me about what was about to happen. I honestly don’t remember anything they said to me. I just remember freaking out internally. I was thinking about all the what ifs, kicking myself for not going to the hospital sooner, not walking around, or bouncing on a ball to get things moving. The nurse that was in charge of me told me I wasn’t allowed to get up because of my water leaking. Also, I had never at this point in my life, had any type of surgery. So yeah, I was losing my shit quite frankly. I even remember telling my husband, “I need my mom.” One of the many things I learned that night is you’re never to old to cry for your mom. I wanted them both in the room when I had Bentley, but that was no longer possible. I remember being wheeled into the OR in tears.
I’m so thankful for the labor and delivery nurse I had that night. I didn’t know this until they stopped RJ at the OR door, but husbands are not allowed in until they’re ready to start.
But this nurse was amazing. I will never forget her singing along to Taylor Swift, and rubbing my shoulders while they prepped me. It actually calmed me down. I have to say, I was extremely lucky and had amazing nurses with all three of my babies. If you’re a nurse reading this, thank you for all that you do.
All the fear though was wiped away though a few minutes later. At 11:02 PM on July 3rd, Bentley William Baker was brought into the world. I remember hearing his cry and feeling immediate relief. My husband bringing him to my side so that I could see his sweet little face. It’s crazy how you immediately love that little baby with your whole being.
I didn’t get to do skin to skin with him until they brought me to recovery. I remember our first nursing session. I was so happy I was able to do it. That was one of my many worries during my pregnancy. I was convinced that I wouldn’t be able too. But things went exactly how they were suppose to in this area.
I did have a major issue with itching. My face felt like it was being constantly tickled. I had to eventually ask for some medicine for it because I couldn’t stop scratching. I had something weird happen after JJ too. That time it was the worst heartburn I had ever experienced, like I thought I was having a heart attack or something. I also had horrible motion sickness. I couldn’t sit even half way up without feeling like I was on the spinning cups at Disney. With Sadie, I only suffered from nausea right before they started. Her c-section was seriously the dream though.
But back to Bentley’s story. I remember all our family meeting him for the first time. I remember being on what I like the call the newborn high. I wasn’t tired even though it was 2 AM and I had been up since 5 AM the previous day. I couldn’t stop smiling and staring at him. It was so crazy to think I had grown this sweet little baby. I couldn’t get enough of him.
Unfortunately, I also remember having a lot of guilt after he was born. I felt like I had failed in a way as a woman because I couldn’t have my baby vaginally. It took me awhile to get over that, and just realize that this was how my babies were suppose to be born. I did think about doing a vback the second time around, but honestly the risks were to much for us. I still get a little sad sometimes because I didn’t get to experience labor. But then I hear stories from other moms that did, and I’m thankful I didn’t. Hahaha
All my other deliveries were smooth sailing, except for what I mentioned above. One huge benefit about a planned c-section is being able to plan everything out! Which is amazing when you’re having your second or third baby. It was so nice knowing who was going to have the kid(s) while we were in the hospital. They also get MUCH MUCH easier. After Sadie I was up and out having lunch.
Here’s pictures from when we welcomed our two other babies into the world.
Jaxson Jay – March 3, 2015 – 12:30 PM – 10 pounds
Sadie Elizabeth – August 31, 2017 – 6:30 AM – 8.16 pounds
Sadie was our ray of sunshine after Harvey destroyed our city. We were thankfully fine, but a lot of people we knew were not.
If you’re reading this and pregnant with your first, here is my advice. Research c-sections. It doesn’t hurt to know what could happen.
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